Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Catch up time

Yep I've been gone for a bit -- did you miss me?

So let's see we made it home in the wee hours of the morning. We found out that Alicia had a similar evening/early morning so they took a later plane and got in in the afternoon on Saturday.

We had an awesome visit, spending time with a wee child has a profound effect on me. Exhausting as they are, they live in such a serene universe ( one of great power at the age 3 ). One of magic, one of wonder and discovery, one of openness and freedom to totally be yourself.

Alicia and I found time to talk a bit about the experience of having cancer and our moms having cancer and being daughter's at risk etc. She is my mother, sister, daughter and I am hers. We are forever connected and she for me is my connection to the spirit world. She is the person I would chose to be stranded on a desert island with...need I say more?

Back to work today back to worry. Thursday I should know if chemo is in my future. So much to do. So much I cannot do. Radiation should give me super powers, right? The tape itches and the lines not covered by tape are slowly being sweated off. I sweat when I sleep.

I miss my cancer free life. To some degree I was less happy. I know it sounds crazy, but cancer makes you crazy. Crazy and I guess sometimes happier. Pointless to be miserable AND have cancer that's what I say...still trying to figure it out.

Tomorrow I'll update you on the wonderful mail I've received recently.

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